


Elven Glory

by Destiny_Apocalypse



Series: Ashanna Lavellan Canon [2]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Elven Glory, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Recreational Drug Use, and a qunari, elves getting high, rating for Sera's filthy mouth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-04-09 11:15:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4346501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Destiny_Apocalypse/pseuds/Destiny_Apocalypse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wrote this as a chance to explore Sera's infamous "Elven Glory" comment in a more natural conversation than the one we got in game.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Elven Glory

Sera lounged on the cushions, legs propped up on the walls while she fiddled with the Dwarven puzzle box in her hands that she had swiped from a camp in the Hinterlands. Dorian had scoffed that she would break the thing before she solved one, but that just shows how much he knew; she was good at locks, really good and this thing was probably not too different right? Plus it was so great to show that rich tit up when she could, even if the stupid box was being a right paint in the arse. Her muttered vulgarities carried out the room on the cool wind that breezed in through the open window, distracting her. So when the door opened, Sera couldn't help but jump in her seat, her head snapping up as the Herald entered her room. A broad grin stretched across her lips at the sight of Ashanna Lavellan looking down at her with a bemused expression. 

“She arrives! Knew you'd get my message, yeah?" Sera set the stupid puzzle whats-it down to work on later. 

“Your message? Is that what you call this crude drawing? You wanted me here so we could talk about butts? 

"Pish, I wasn't planning on us talking at all tonight. I had another kind of fun planned." Ashanna looked up at her sharply, a startled expression crossing her face. "Not like that!" Sera groaned, making a face. "I meant this." Leaping to her feet and digging through a pile of stuff, she waggled a large, ornate pipe towards Lavellan’s direction. Varric had given it Sera after declaring that he needed to keep his head clear while he was dealing with this inquisition shit, and Sera liked to think that some Orzammar noble would shit bricks if they knew it was given to her so casually. 

"You asked me here to smoke with you?" Ashanna raised an eyebrow in response, but Sera could see the amusement hiding in the slight curve of her mouth. She always did that; always had to work to get this one to show a proper reaction. Most people thought it was because she was the touched lady herald, but Sera knew better. The inquisitor wasn't good with people. Probably raised by halla, or whatever weird shit elves get up to in the woods. 

"Yes?" Sera giggled again, holding the pipe up and fumbling with her flint. A spark lit and stuttered out almost instantly before it could light the pipe. Sera frowned, grumbling to herself as she attempted to light it again. 

"It just seems rather...frivolous right now. Josephine left a stack of reports in my quarters that I need to go through-" She trailed off, seeing Sera's generous scowl. 

"It's only been a week since you were stuck in the fade with a bunch of demons, and now you're worried about paperwork and shite?! Your priorities are all sorts of messed up. How about we forget about stupid papers and just get high as balls for now?" 

The corner of Ashanna's mouth tugged upwards finally, losing its battle. "You make a very compelling argument," she laughed, leaning forward with an outstretched hand. A small flicker of fire burst from her finger to light the pipe, and Sera let the smoke flow into her lungs before exhaling it out the open window. Hmm, so mages were good for something at least. 

"This stuff is tits, lady inquisitor. Its not just any elfroot. It's the _Orlesian_ variety. That means it's expensive shit." 

"Oh I'm familiar with it. Elfroot is smoked ceremoniously for several rituals that we performed in my clan." She grabbed the pipe and smelled the substance that was stuffed inside it. "Smells like royal elfroot to me." 

Sera's face twisted into a grimace not unlike if she'd eaten a lemon. "Ughhh. D'ya mean this is an elfy thing I've been doing without realizing? Andraste's friggin' arse-.”

"Well, not unless you're also performing a rite to Sylaise," Ashanna chuckled at the sour look on Sera's face. "Sometimes we'd pass around some after a particularly good hunt. It's a common herb, I'm sure many cultures smoke it. So...it's not just an elfy thing." 

"Well that's a relief! I was worried for a minute I was channeling my inner savage. Here, your turn." Sera handed the pipe to the inquisitor, allowing her to take a deep drag. Yeah. she definitely had experience, blowing out enough smoke to fill the room with a white haze before it drifted out the open window. The Herald's eyes glazed slightly as the effects of the herb drifted through her body and she relaxed against the cushions. Good to see her less uptight for once, she was a serious one. And this stuff was friggin’ good; Adan would be _so_ mad when he found someone had nicked his stash. 

"Soooo....." Sera drawled after both elves had passed the pipe back and forth several times, consuming most of the elfroot packed within. Ashanna giggled as Sera drew the sounds of her word out longer than necessary. "This Herald shit. It's all crazy, inn'it? People bowing and worshipping you like Andraste herself." 

"I don't think I'll ever get used to it," Ashanna admitted, leaning on the cushions so she was practically on her back. "I'm grateful for you and the others who treat me like a normal person. Makes me feel less crazy." 

"As normal as we can treat an elfy elf with a glowing scar on their hand and practically shits magic. But don't worry, lady Herald. Me and the others aren't into being all boot-licky to you. You don't even wear boots half the time anyway!" The archer broke off into a chortle, amused by her own attempt at a joke. She paused for a moment then, as if considering. "Except maybe Blackwall; I think he'd be into that sort of thing." 

"Sera..." Lavellan stared at the other elf, unamused. Sera stuck her tongue out in response. 

"Oh, shut it. It's just stupid fun. I already know all about yoooooou and Solas anyhow." 

Ashanna didn't respond at first, instead smiling privately as she got lost in some memory or another. Sera noted the guilty flush on her cheeks as she furiously tried to busy herself with the pipe to cover her expression. 

"I've seen how you look at him," Sera continued, mischief twinkling in her eyes. "You're in it. I bet he calls out 'Elven Glory' when he does it!" 

Ashanna choked mid-inhale; smoke curling around her mouth and nose as her laughter turned into a coughing fit. Sera cackled as the Inquisitor fought to catch her breath. 

"That's ridiculous," Ashanna protested once she was able to speak again, waving the smoke out the open window. Such a private person, the inquisitor was; Sera could tell she was not going to speak more on the subject unless she was prodded. Fortunately Sera was the best kind of prodder. 

"I mean at first I was like, ey they're both elves, and elves always do the bumping bits together. And you both like talking about boring ancient dead stuff. But then it was still a little weird because he's so old. And bald. And booooring. And he friggin' hates the Dalish! Made no sense, right!?” 

"And now you get it?" Ashanna asked sarcastically, a playful smile curling her lip. 

"Well, he's big for an elf, innit'he? Tall, right? I've snuck a peak at his trousers when he wasn't looking. He's definitely big in other places too." She leaned close to Lavellan, who was not reacting to her innuendo at all and was instead staring studiously at a crack in the wall. "Like his cock," she whispered into Ashanna's ear, making sure to clarify her meaning. 

"Sera!" Ashanna was truly scandalized now, her hand going over her mouth like she was some sort of prudish chantry sister. Sera dissolved into a fit of spirited laughter at the sight of the other elf's dark skin turning even darker, making her freckles stand out starkly in the dim light.

"I mean, I get that, even if I don't really _get_ that. I'm not into that sort of thing, but I know you are. So I’m right, yeah?" 

The mortified look on the Inquisitor’s face told Sera all she needed to know, and she laughed so hard she snorted several times, nearly choking on her own spit from her mirth. 

“Maker, your face! I bloody knew it; Bull owes me ten copper!" 

"You guys...bet on that?" Her voice wavered between approval and chastisement, her jaw trembling from trying to hold back her laughter. After a moment the amusement won out, likely thanks to the elfroot, and Ashanna joined her with a series of broken giggles. The giggles quickly spiraled out of control, slipping into a hysterical sort of laughter that had the Herald slumped over on the couch with shaking shoulders. Her amusement was contagious, and Sera couldn't help but giggle along with her. 

"You're right Sera, it's...it's magnificent," she gasped when she regained use of her voice, tears leaking from her eyes. "Not just that it's big, because it is, but he knows how to use it and then there's the rest of his _body-_ " 

"Enough of that, you!" Sera put her hand over the Herald's mouth, cringing at the mental image that popped in her head. "Now you're making me think of his pasty, hairless, naked body and there's no amount of elfroot I can smoke to make that appealing to me!" Taking a deep breath, Sera instead tried to fill her thoughts of muscular, buxom horned women. She imagined one kneeling at her feet, running a strong hand up her leg and Sera sighed dreamily. Definitely more sexy.

"Sera, you really should try being with a mage at least once. I've been doing magic all my life, but Creators, the things he showed me and the things he did to me..." 

"Not listening to this! Not even a little bit!" She clamped her hands over her own pointed ears, shaking her head back and forth. When she looked up again, Lavellan was grinning at her, her white teeth flashing in the poorly lit room. 

"You brought it up, Sera," Ashanna said smugly, wiping the tears from her face.

"I did, I did." Sera couldn't help but chortle, her face red from mirth and mind altering substances. "Maker, do I regret it now. I won't be able to think about anything else now when I see you two. Ugh, that's nasty stuff." 

A silence stretched between them as they both recovered from their giggles. Ashanna lay on her back, her feet on the arm of the couch, her arm coming up to cover her face. Sera took the time to grab the satchel with freshly ground elfroot and pack the pipe anew. 

"He calls me _vhenan._ " Ashanna broke the silence with a sudden statement, the wonder in her voice evident. Her fingers traced over her lips as her face turned all dreamy. Maker, the girl was truly in it. 

Sera didn't know what that elf word meant and didn't really care. Instead she handed the pipe back to Lavellan and prompted her to take her turn. 

"Yeah yeah, you two are lovely together. So happy for you. Let's talk of something other than boring elves and their magical dicks okay? Like Cassandra's lack of smallclothes. You heard that, right? Think she's always running around starkers under that armor?" 

Ashanna didn't respond for a moment, looking lost in thought as she blew out another plume of smoke. "Aren't we all really just starkers under our armor, Sera?" She asked, with such seriousness that it set the other elf off again. Sera laughed at the look on her face, then kept laughing because she was unable to stop, and could only clutch at her sides from the effort and pain. 

The door swung open and both elves jumped as if guilty at the sudden motion while Sera choked to catch her breath. The Iron Bull stood at the doorway, and at the sight of the two elves lounging in a haze of smoke he curled his lip in a wide grin. "Well, that explains the giggling. It smells like a Seheron smoke shop in here."

"Bull!" Sera called happily, waving the qunari in the room. He obliged, stepping into the tiny space and filling it with his massive bulk instantly. The two elves scooted to either end of the chaise to allow him room to sit, though it protested with violent creaking sounds when his weight was added to it. 

"Don't mind if I do!" Bull plucked the pipe from Ashanna's fingertips, the contraption looking absurdly tiny in his meaty hands. Still, he managed to handle the slim piece of wood gingerly and delicately while igniting the entire bowl. The amount of smoke he exhaled was massive; both elves coughed and waved their hands to clear the plumes of smoke that now filled the room. 

"That is. Good. Stuff," Bull's voice was part wheeze, part chuckle. "Way better than the stuff we got from the Tamassrans." He coughed, then slapped his knee in a motion that nearly dislodged Ashanna from her seat. 

"No way!" Sera's mouth dropped open in awe. "They just...gave you elfroot to smoke?" 

"Of course! You think they wouldn't want to make a substance that calms and mellows a race like the qunari readily available? They handed that shit out like candy." 

"Mmmmhmmmm, sign me up for the Qun," Sera sighed happily, already imagining a life filled with endless elfroot and qunari women. 

"Right. It's all drugs and tits until they start making your life decisions for you regardless of your personal wishes," Ashanna scoffed. 

Sera and Bull both exchanged a glance at the exact same time, each having the same thought go through their head at that moment before bursting into fits of laughter; Sera so hard she fell off the couch and was now rolling on the floor. 

"You...you said tits, Quizzie!"

"So?" She sounded cross, her brow furrowing as she tried to work out their ridiculous behavior. "I can say tits."

"Boss, for as long as we've been fighting together, I've never once heard you swear, let alone say tits." 

"Say it again!" Sera wiped the tears running down her face. "It's funny when you say it. Tits." 

"I've said tits before," Ashanna protested as Sera was overtaken by another fit. Bull fixed her with a disbelieving look. "...Probably." They both shook their heads at her. 

_"Lasa adahl su nar masa,"_ she muttered under her breath. 

"Use real people words, Inquisitor!" Sera sat up on her elbows, face shining with mischief. "Maybe you should start talking about Solas' dick again; that seemed to get your dirty side talking." 

"Oh yes, please do," The Iron Bull agreed, crossing his arms to sit attentively. "Though I guess that means I owe Sera ten copper." 

"I think...I am not nearly inebriated enough for this sort of conversation." Ashanna's face was now more red than brown as she stood up quickly, swaying on her feet slightly and clutching the wall for support. 

"Hah! Easily rectified, Boss. We got enough elfroot and alcohol in this tavern to occupy us all night" 

"Yes...I'm aware of that. I'm afraid I'm going to call it a night, Inquisitor duties and all...you two pipeheads can have at it yourselves." 

"Nooo, stay!" Sera made the most pitiful pout, but it did not sway the Inquisitor's mind as she awkwardly made her way past the mass of qunari blocking the doorway before making her escape. 

"Balls," The archer sighed, stretching out on the floor. She glanced over at The Iron Bull and held out a hand. "You owe me some coin." 

****

She truly did have paperwork to work on that Josephine had not so subtly been nudging her to complete, but she supposed it was still the herb trickling through her bloodstream that steered her towards the rotunda rather than the stack of papers awaiting her at her desk. Perhaps she still required a bit more of a distraction that Sera could offer. 

Solas was in his usual spot, sitting on the lounge with a tome, though one could hardly considering him actually lounging with the rigid and straight posture he bore. When he became aware of her presence she could see the softening in him immediately; his spine settling back against the softness of the cushions and his facial expression losing its severity as he greeted her with a soft smile. 

" _Vhenan._ Something I can assist you with?" His voice was low and warm, the timbre causing goosebumps to prickle on her skin. Odd, when had it started to feel so sensitive? She shivered. 

"Solas." Her voice sounded thick and strange on her tongue. His attention was fully on her, making her acutely aware of how tight her skin felt at the moment. She took a step closer to him, staring at the near invisible freckles across the bridge of his nose that she'd never noticed before. "There is something you can assist with," she said, tongue darting out to wet her lips. She did not miss the way Solas' eyes focused on that particular movement intently.

"I am all ears, as they say," Solas raised an eyebrow in a hint of a tease. 

"My tits." She whispered. 

"I....excuse me?" His eyes blinked quickly in rapid succession in response. He seemed truly at a loss for words; a state Ashanna had only seen him in the first time she confronted them after their fade kiss. He set the book down on the cushion next to him and stood up to confront her directly. 

"They require assistance," Ashanna mumbled, feeling her face heat up. That sounded so much more sexy in her head. Damn Sera; she was right. It just sounded ridiculous coming from her, as she so rarely used vulgar words. Did she just blurt that out? 

Solas leaned down to brush his hand through hair, bringing it up to his face and inhaling. "Ah, I had a feeling that's what that smell was. Sera's doing, I presume?" 

"She...encouraged it, though I was easily led astray by the suggestion. Now that I'm quite finished humiliating myself, I'll take my leave-" She turned to exit out the way she came, wondering if she could convince herself it had all been a fade dream. 

A firm grip on her elbow stopped her in her tracks, however, and Ashanna turned her gaze on the elf behind her, eyes wide.

"If you would allow it, I would be more than happy to assist you, Inquisitor." His voice was polite and without any inflection that would indicate indecent intentions, so any nosy inhabitants of the upper floors would have little reason to suspect ulterior motives. The hunger in his eyes was unmistakable, and spoke otherwise as to his true intentions. "With...whatever you require." 

"It might take a while," A slow grin spreading on her face. 

"It is fortunate that the night is still young." A hint of a smirk played on his lips. "Please, after you." 

 

****

Translation (From project elvhen)

Lasa adahl su nar masa - Shove a tree up your ass

**Author's Note:**

> Another piece that's been gathering dust on my HD. While re-reading stuff for notes in between chapters of Antique Dreams I realized this story now fits in pretty well with the new canon I established, so I edited it up and gave it a proper ending.


End file.
